Thursday, October 23, 2014

Hello Blog.

We've met before. Blog and I.

We didn't get along. I could launch into the traditional excuses for when a couple breaks up and do my best to place the blame anywhere but on me. Except running a blog isn't a romantic relationship and the harsh truth is I had nothing of value to say. So Blog and I parted ways.

What has changed? And why am I talking to you like you care? WELL. I'm reading a book called 'How to BLOG A Book' by Nina Amir and endorsed by Writer's Digest. Book is working very hard to breathe life back into my relationship with Blog, not that we ever were exclusive or had a real 'thing'. I'm skeptical. How can blogging a first draft of a novel be a good thing? Especially blogging my first draft which usually resembles something closer to a pile of.... words.

Book assures me that all aspiring authors must have a relationship with Blog if they want to get anywhere. Book also recommends that I make numerous appearances on talk shows in all mediums; internet, radio, and television. And produce my own videos. And post on social media. And have extremely long mailing list. All of that while giving frequent talks to small, medium and large groups. Book is quite confident in my abilities. Thanks, Book. You're sweet.

Book has even more recommendations on how to build an author's platform, but has told me that I'm giving away too many secrets. So I'm sorry, but if you want more of these tips, Book insists that you must go to Writer's Digest Bookstore and take it home. I haven't had time to get to know Book very well yet. We're not in the "I love you so much I'm taking you into the tub with me" phase yet, and I'm not sure we ever will be, but Book isn't without its charms. It did bring me here after all.

My first real post on my blog. About a blog. While reading about how to blog. I keep glancing around, half expecting a blog paradox or a blogpocalypse. I'm not sure what a blogpocalypse would look like. Maybe something like what happens to my first drift when my cat, Fallon, climbs onto my laptop and sits down.

And for the unanswered question: why you should care? I guess you don't and won't... perhaps shouldn't, but that's okay. Blog and I shall just yammer away over here in our own little corner. I'll get to know Blog and learn its quirks, discover its annoying habits, listen to the bad jokes. Maybe, just maybe, I'll find something worth saying.


  1. Would that be "blogpocalypse"? Either way, I am glad catastrophe was averted (so far...dum dum DAH!).


  2. Ehem, er well, yes. (Quickly runs away to edit.)


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